Forgiving Past Hurts (9th Homily)

In the Roman rite, green would be worn on a Sunday during Ordinary Time.  However, in the Byzantine rite, white or gold was worn this past Sunday.  The Roman rite or Latin rite vestment I am wearing is my ordination dalmatic (Roman Catholic priests wear a chasuble, not a dalmatic, over their stole and alb). 

Latin rite or Roman rite is why we are called "Roman Catholics" instead of Byzantine Catholics.

PHOTO WITH OUR MOTHER OF PEPETUAL HELP IN THE BACKGROUND (L TO R):
Latin-rite Deacon Dennis Purificacion; Byzantine-rite Father Anthony Hernandez;
Byzantine-rite Father Deacon Craig Anderson

I was first exposed to the Byzantine rite from my earliest years as a teenager and young adult.  Father Anthony first exposed me (and invited me to join) the Byzantine rite.  In college, I went on a silent retreat at Holy Transfiguration Monastery for a week where I fell in love even more with the Byzantine rite.  The silent retreat itself set the standard for all other retreats that I was to attend thereafter.  No other retreats have compared to it!  I am grateful to Father Anthony who exposed me to the world of Eastern Rite Catholicism.

During the Divine Liturgy (what Roman rite Catholics call the Mass), I got to see the Byzantine rite and Father Anthony up front and personal.  I had to learn parts of the ritual quickly.  Did you know that Eastern rite deacons have more of a liturgical role than Roman rite deacons?  They move around more than the priest does.

I chanted the Gospel after some basic training with Fr. Anthony using a very basic chant tone.  I just kept it simple.  I couldn't record the chanting because I was proclaiming the Gospel in the middle of the sanctuary and hitting my record button would have look un-liturgical and odd.  I preached from the pulpit where I was able to record without distracting the Liturgy.

During the fellowship after Divine Liturgy in the hall, I spoke with some of the parishioners.  One gentleman said that he knew Fr. John J. Sweeny, another priest I grew up with and served as an altar boy.  He told me that he appreciated a Roman Catholic understanding what the Eastern Churches were about.  I think this is the best thing that Roman rite Catholics can do for Byzantine rite Catholics.  Roman Catholics don't realize that there are other rites in union with Rome.  I would encourage Roman Catholics to attend a Byzantine Catholic Divine Liturgy.  Here are some locations:

St. Basil the Great Byzantine Catholic Church
14263 Mulberry Dr., Los Gatos, CA 95032
http://www.stbasil.org

St. Philip the Apostle Byzantine Catholic Church
3866 65th Street Sacramento, CA 95820
http://www.stphilipofsacramento.com

One humorous moment was when a lady invited me to become Byzantine rite and asked me to be a priest!  I laughed. 

Finally, it is odd-sounding to Roman/Latin rite Catholics, but the permanent deacons in the Byzantine rite are called "Father Deacon".  It doesn't sound odd to me, since I knew this ever since I was younger.  We permanent deacons in the Church in the West or in the Latin rite should be grateful that the Church in the East retained the permanent diaconate as a permanent rank of the hierarchy (as opposed to it being a mere stepping stone to the priesthood).  Remember, the Latin rite Church restored the diaconate as a permanent order at the Council fifty years ago.  But it has been retained in the Churches of the East for centuries. 

We have much to learn from the Churches of the East.  

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Homily @ Byzantine Rite Divine Liturgy: “Forgiving Past Hurts”

Parable of the Unforgiving Servant (Mt. 18:21-35)

You and I know what it is like to have to forgive someone that has hurt us.  You and I also know what it is like to have to be the one who actually did the hurting.

Many years ago, I taught religion at one of our Bay Area Catholic high schools.  And there, I had a student who approached me on a difficult situation that involved violence to her and even her family.  There were other professionals and law enforcement official involved with this, but since she knew me to be a practicing Catholic, she confided in me many of the details of the tragedy.  I even involved our local priest in this case.  I saw my role as more of a spiritual support and whatever practical support I could give. 

I also knew the aggressor.

At some point, I was able to meet and sit down with the aggressor.   Assuming all the facts of this violence matter to be true, my intent was to bring the one that brought violence to conversion, repentance, even the Sacrament of Reconciliation, and also to have him apologize to her (since that’s what she asked for—an apology).  She knew that she needed to forgive, and she did after many years.  But she also wanted closure with a verbal apology from the aggressor.

The matter, to my knowledge, has not been resolved, and I do ask you to lift up a quick prayer for it. 

 

In the Middle East, many of us are aware of the systematic persecution and genocide of Christians and other religious minorities, especially in Iraq, going on at this very moment.  The Holy Father Francis, the Pope of Rome, has on many times condemned these gross acts of violence and war, even though the media and our leaders in the West remain generally silent in defense of the poor and the oppressed there.

The most heart-wrenching of this situation involves little children who suffer and die simply because they were baptized in the faith of their parents.  I do not know how one can hear of the violence against these innocent children (and non-combatants) and yet remain indifferent.

This matter, too, remains unresolved. And it calls for prayer and fasting.

 

But whether it is closer to home in the case of my former student, far away on the other side of the globe, or any particular hurt that you yourself have carried around for many years, the difficult teaching of forgiveness still somehow – somehow -- applies for us Christians.  What is a Christian to do in response to the violence and hurt? 

Forgiving does not mean what the other person did was right or that justice should not be dispensed.  Forgiving does not mean being a door mat and being walked all over or that one does not have the right to defend oneself.  In fact, justice should be dispensed and the vulnerable should be defended against an unjust aggressor (and the Church should be at the forefront of defending the innocent and defenseless.) Forgiving does not mean approving the act.

Rather, forgiving, St. John Paul the Great wrote, is a decision of the heart to go against the natural instinct to pay back evil with evil.  Forgiving is a decision of the heart to go against the natural instinct to pay back evil with evil.  St. John Paul also wrote that Christ is the exemplar of forgiveness when He prayed, “Father, forgive them for they know not what they do” (Lk. 23).  Forgiveness has a divine source (and requires grace) that is a truly human act. 

Forgiveness and meekness simply means hatred and revenge should not take root in the heart.  These natural instincts can easily eat away at one’s heart and waste away even years of one’s life by being consumed in in hatred.  Let the natural anger that emerges in one’s heart be permeated with Christ’s words that we see in the Gospel today to guide it as a response to the evil in our increasingly dangerous world of violence and acts of war. 

 

In the section on Christian Prayer in the Catechism of the Catholic Church, the petition “And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass again us” is called “astonishing”.  Astonishing.

It is astonishing because our petition to be forgiven will not be heard unless we have first met a strict requirement to forgive.  The petition looks to the future, but our response must come first NOW.  The two petitions are joined by the single word “as”.  Forgive us AS we forgive others.  Forgive us AND forgive others.

Even though we are clothed with baptismal innocence and the white garment, we do not cease to sin and turn away from God.  We are all sinners before God (save Our Lord and His Mother), but we are confident in God’s mercy if we ask for it.

At the beginning of this homily, brothers and sisters, I focused on the first part of this petition: Forgive others (those who trespass against us).  In my second major point, we now focus on the first part of the petition “Forgive us our sins”.

The Catechism teaches, “In refusing to forgive our brothers and sisters, our hearts are closed and their hardness makes them impervious to the Father’s merciful love…” (#2840).  Don’t let others hurt of you be the cause of a closed heart and a hardened heart.  Don’t perpetuate the aggressor’s actions by letting it affect you.

Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy!

 

Forgiving others becomes possible AS God in Christ forgave us.

Our Lord’s teaching on the parable of the merciless servant today “crowns the Lord’s teaching on ecclesial communion”. “So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart.”  It is there in the HEART – in the depths of your heart and my heart – that everything is bound and loosed. 

It is not in our power to necessarily forget an offense, but the heart under grace can transform injury into compassion and purify the hurtful moment into INTECESSION.

Suffering here becomes redemptive!

 

Forgiveness of even enemies transforms the disciple to his or her Master.  It testifies that love is stronger than death.

Love is stronger than sin.  Love is stronger that violence. 

Look at the martyrs of the holy Catholic Church from the time of the archdeacon Stephen to today.  There was a Sister who was killed in retaliation to Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI’s comments on Islam.  She was stabbed.  As she lay dying, she uttered the word, “Forgive.”  Forgive.

 

The holy Sacraments of the Church will help us live this and purify our hearts.  Imagine somehow that the pain and agony in your hearts and my heart is somehow united with Jesus on the Cross.

In the Sacrament of Reconcilation, esp. bring your sins here and trust in God’s ocean of mercy.

The Divine Mercy is a great way to help heal your heart.

Think of your sins as a drop of water….and then imagine going to Ocean Beach in San Francisco and throwing it in the Pacific Ocean.  The Pacific Ocean itself is just a drop of God’s mercy.

In the Holy Eucharist, which we will receive today, give the hurt and anger in the heart to the Crucified Christ.

I ask that you offer it for the suffering Christians in the Middle East.

 

In fact, let this homily be a moment for the Church to raise her voice and condemn the violence in the Middle East.  Pray, act, let others know what is going on there. 

In the case of my student, even this ongoing situation calls for the defense of the weak, even as violence happens.

And you brothers and sisters? What hurt is there that can be let go of today?  Offer it here today at Divine Liturgy.  And be strengthened by these holy and sacred mysteries.

As I close my homily, I want to say thank you to you, beautiful people, and I want to thank Father Anthony, my mentor and teacher ever since I was a teenager.  He exposed me to the Churches of the East.  As you can see, I’m wearing Roman vestments.  I’m a (new) Roman permanent deacon, and this is my first time here.  Thank you, Father Anthony, for letting me (con)celebrate* with you.

Let us reflect on these words from Our Lord: “So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart.” 

 

*Deacons are considered “concelebrants” in the Divine Liturgy of the East, and in the West deacons “assist” at Mass.

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Purificacion, Dennis (Aug. 24, 2014).  "Homily: Forgiving Past Hurts" (Palo Alto, CA: St. Albert the Great Catholic Church) blogged at www.marysdeacon.blogspot.com on Aug. 27, 2014.